04 August 2024

Session 8 Downtime: The Blasti-bros


The Blasti-bros (Blastikus and Brother Sully)

Blastikus and Brother Sully make a quick detour to the village of Eilifsdalsa to confer with Blastikus' henchmen, Jack Stabby and Johnny Crush. The trip is uneventful (no random encounters) and they reach the village in early evening. The duo wearily make their way to Maison de Blastikus on the outskirts of town and find the half orcs throwing axes in the fields behind his abode. A lamb roasts on the spit, filling the air with the sumptuous aroma of dinner.

"At least you're not both stinking drunk yet", Blastikus says as they unsaddle their horses and ready to put them out to pasture for the evening.

"Eh, well we just woke up a few hours ago," Jack replies as he retrieves an axe from the center of the target. "Heh...you've both seen better days. What happened to yer chums?"

"Philosophical differences," Blastikus replies, fixing the insolent half-orc with a gaze that warns the subject is closed. "We're moving to Old Brightwood in the morning."

"About time," Johnny replies, giving the lamb a turn on the spit. "The locals don't like us much and we're getting bored. Someone might go missing, otherwise. We need some fun."

"Not here, you won't. I need this place to stay quiet and out of the way in case we need it later. Old Brightwood is a little more...fluid, shall we say. I think some loot would go a long ways to treating your boredom, eh?"

"That it would, boss, that it would. What's the plan?", Jack asks.

"Go to the village center tomorrow after Sully and I leave. Get a pair of draft horses and a wagon and load up all my equipment from the cabin. Hire some of the local imbeciles if you need to - they have strong backs, at least. Meet us in Old Brightwood as soon as possible and be ready for some action when you do. That rube Redneck is out for blood because he blames us for Fitzy joining the ancients. Regardless of what happens with him, we all need some coin so we'll find some up north. Is everything clear? I detest repeating myself."

"Clear as crystal, milord," Johnny replies with a wicked grin. "Finally some fun!"

After eating, Sully and Blastikus confer about their course of action. They both agree that the treasure hoard in the Oni maps cannot be ignored, but not at their current strength. They decide to try to recruit some more companions upon arrival in Old Brightwood and explore any local leads they may uncover. The refugees in Fort Rackham mentioned that there were several large ruins throughout the countryside that the hordes took over as bases. Old stories claim there was fantastic treasure to be had, so both agree it's worth investigating further. They turn in for the night, agreeing to leave before dawn to avoid drawing any unwelcome attention from the gossiping villagers.

As planned, the duo rise in the darkness of early morning and uneventfully take the northern road to Old Brightwood, a city of some 50,000 souls. The journey is smooth, with no random encounters. They reach the city in late afternoon and immediately notice the heavy military presence throughout the city. The walls are manned with crossbowmen and artillerists and all entrances are heavily guarded. Frequent patrols keep the streets eerily clear, enforcing an oppressive silence on the once vibrant city. Upon the recommendation of one of the guards, they make their way to the Oak Tree Inn and find a densely populated common room of an otherwise comfortable in. All conversations are in hushed tones and few of the customers even bother to look in their direction. 

"Quite the lively bunch, eh?", Sully remarks.

"It's better this way, you know. Low interest gives us greater freedom to move." Blastikus replies. "I'll get us some rooms and we can start prospecting."

The Blasti-bros Appear

Similar to the procedure for The Mighty Redneck, I roll a d6 for number of allies, d4+4 for level so that they would roughly be around the Bros level, and rolled on the Character Subtable DMG pg 175 for the results below. Sully is conducting the negotiations (+25% Charisma bonus) and we get:
  1. Marsh Bersk Human Male, Lvl 7 Magicuser (True Neutral)
    Uncertain but 55% prone toward positive

  2. Krall Diacan Human Male, Lvl 8 Assassin (Chaotic Evil)
    Uncertain but 55% prone toward positive

  3. Luisa Human Female, Lvl 5 Cleric (Chaotic Neutral)
    Enthusiastically friendly, immediate acceptance

  4. Randal Human Male, Lvl 6 Cleric (Lawful Good)
    Uncertain but 55% prone toward positive

  5. Mog Khalid Human Male, Lvl 7 Fighter (Chaotic Good)
    Enthusiastically friendly, immediate acceptance (base roll of 90% + total modifiers of 30%)

  6. Skyrax Human Male, Lvl 7 Fighter (Lawful Neutral)
    Uncertain but 55% prone toward positive
I decide that Randal and Skyrax, both being Lawful, smell the taint of Chaos on Sully and tell him to sod off. Luisa and Mog are both clearly excited enamored of the dashing Sully and the others go along for the payday. After the group confers, they share news and the rumor table is updated with new potential hooks.

The Blasti-bros are ready!













Session 8 Downtime: The Band of Brogallos

 


The Band of Brogallos (Brogallo and Kleptikos)

Having saved the Bro-cenaries from Zenabarithon's wrath (thus preserving his power base), Brogallo and Kleptikos make their way to Valthrun with the warband and quickly decamp with the officers to a discrete tavern named The White Rose. They quietly enter the watering hole, and Brogallo tosses a gold piece to the bartender saying, "Greetings Rakov! We need the feasthall for some privacy. Bring food and drink and see that none of the peasants bother us."

"Aye, milord. The room's yours until you tell me otherwise. I'll have the slaves prepare your rooms, as usual."

"Good man! Bring the drink immediately and the food as soon as it's ready - we're starved and parched from the road."

The group makes its way to the private feast hall in the rear of the inn and quickly bar the door before falling into the plush divans surrounding the hearth, where a cozy fire crackles. Two slave girls quietly enter from a hidden door in the rear of the hall. With downcast gazes the efficiently spread out a half dozen bottles of liquor and several loaves of bread before quickly leaving, all the while avoiding the gazes of the predators that have descended upon their world.

Lt Stoner barks a sharp laugh before saying "I like it when they're terrified of us. It makes it so much easier to deal with them!" The warriors all chuckle before Brogallo says, "Enough. Hand me a glass of that whiskey and let's get business out of the way so we can relax. Let's be honest boys - we were damned lucky to get out of that last scrap with our hides intact."

A chorus of unanimous murmurs shows the others agree. "I don't like that dragon flying around these parts", Brogallo continues, "I think it might be worth our while to head north for some coin and fun. What's your thoughts, lads?"

Stoner is the first to reply, saying "I never much cared for Valthrun, sir. Let's leave this place and join more sympathetic sorts up north. Lots of work to be had, for sure."

Sgt Rock, after taking a long draught from a bottle of absinthe, is the first to respond. "Slaughter's boys and mine are right glad to be alive and obliged to you for getting us out of that scrap, sir. They'll definitely be happy to get into more familiar territory and get some loot off the hobgobbos, as well."

Sgt Slaughter agrees enthusiastically, saying "'Tis true, sir. things are bit too crazy down here. Much more fun turning the gobbos into pin cushions and much less risk than going toe-to-toe with the wyrm."

"And you, Kleptikos? Will you join us?", Brogallo asks.

"Without question. I was getting sick of that bumpkin and those self-righteous priests, so the farther away, the better. Blastikus was alright, but I think he might be starting to get delusions of grandeur and egotistical wizards tend to take risks that are detrimental to the health of sane people. We've still got a few months before the snow sets in, so we might as well get some loot while we can."

"Fair enough, boys. Let's spend a few days here to unwind and then we'll head out to Tallow Watch to see what we see. Let's eat!"

Late that evening, after the others have passed out in drunken stupors, Kleptikos quietly slips out of the inn and makes his way through the now silent darkened streets. He has long cultivated the ability to appear to drink far more than he really consumes and has used it to liberate many valuables from irresponsible owners in the past. This time, however, he wishes to conduct private business instead of the far more enjoyable larceny. 

He makes his way to a derelict building and slips into the adjoining alley. After a few yards, he discretely presses two of the bricks, causing a section of the wall to silently open inwards. He slips in quickly, silently closing the hidden door behind him. Deftly, he silently makes his way to a rear room where he finds a youth barely into his teens quietly making notes in a ledger by candlelight.

"Hey there, boss. Been expecting  you since the kids saw you and the muscle go through the eastern gates earlier today. What news?"

"Redneck is out for blood after I gave him the slip during a scrap with a dragon. The simpleton actually thought I'd face down a monster for no good reason. I'm going to head north to check on my boys up there." He tosses a small pouch of coins to the youth and says "Here. Take some for yourself and share the rest with the kids. If Redneck is still alive and comes back here, tell him I got caught trying to steal some rich dame's jewels and met my end at the hands of her guards. He'll believe it and it will take the heat off while I sort out my northern affairs."

"Is there any news to report, Selark?" Kleptikos wearily asks, rubbing his eyes and reaching for the bottle of wine on the table.

"Mostly the usual comings and goings, boss. There is one thing unusual, however."

"Well, spit it out damn it!", Kleptikos snaps. "It's late and I need some sleep."

Fearful of having overstepped his bounds with undue familiarity, Selark pales  before blurting out "The Oni boss! Some people have said they've seen them prowling around! They catch a glance of one before they disappear in front of their eyes. The kids have overheard adults talking when they went begging. The adults seem really spooked about this."

"Hmm... well that's Blastikus' problem to solve. He's got their damned map, not me. Keep an ear out for anything more. I'll send a messenger to Hamyla's place with news when I get settled up north. He'll be wearing a red bandana like they do on the taiga. Pay him the standard fee and give him any updates."

"Sure thing, boss, sure thing. Are you calling it a night?"

"I am. It's well past my bed time", Kleptikos says as he turns to leave. He pauses before turning to Selark and saying "Don't fuck this up, boy. Keep doing as I say and all will be well. If you start getting any crazy ideas in your head about your true place in life...well, the sewers are always hungry."

"N-n-no problem, boss", Selark stammers, "Everything will be the way you want! I promise! I like things the way they are, just fine!"

Kleptikos stares into the boy's eyes for a long moment before silently turning and disappearing into the darkness.

The group sets out for Tallow Watch after a few days of recreation and reach the city uneventfully. Brogallo decides to start prospecting for some additions to the party with results below.

The Band of Brogallos Appear

Similar to the procedure for The Mighty Redneck, I roll a d6 for number of allies, d4+4 for level so that they would roughly be around the Bros level, and rolled on the Character Subtable DMG pg 175 for the results below. Kleptikos is conducting the negotiations (+30% Charisma bonus) and we get:
  1. Ah Soh Human Male, Lvl 8 Monk (Lawful Evil)
    Uncertain but 55% prone toward positive

  2. Man Lee Human Male, Lvl 6 Magic-User (True Neutral)
    Friendly, immediate action

  3. Manderbro Male, Lvl 7 Magic-User (True Neutral)
    Enthusiastically friendly, immediate acceptance

  4. No Tiki Human Male, Lvl 7 Fighter (Chaotic Neutral)
    Enthusiastically friendly, immediate acceptance

  5. Otilola Human Female, Lvl 7 Cleric (Chaotic Good)
    Neutral - uninterested - uncertain

  6. Voon deGoon Human Male, Lvl 7 Fighter (Neutral Evil)
    Uncertain but 55% prone toward positive
I decide that Otilola is creeped out by Kleptikos, slaps him and leaves. The rest are swayed by Kleptikos' sly words and join for the lucrative payday. After the group confers, they share news and the rumor table is updated with new potential hooks.


The Band of Brogallos March Forth!

Session 8 Downtime: Redneck's Mighty Riders


Redneck's Mighty Riders (Mighty Redneck)

Still reeling from the betrayal of the others, Redneck decides to seek the counsel of his trainer, Brog Bersk (L11 CG ranger) whom I randomly decide lives in the mountains (hex 301.302) south of the Shrine of Lethria. He safely arrives (all encounter checks came up blank) at the mountain stronghold of Brog and informs him of the developments. Brog urges caution when dealing with the Chaos beast and marvels that such a small group of unprepared adventurers survived the appetite of Zenabarithon and his mate. He reluctantly suggests that Redneck consult with the Porius Sepret, Druid of the Order of the Starless Wastes since he may have more information and lives close to the lakes that were targeted by the dragons. Brog gives Redneck directions to find Druid Porius in wooded hills (hex 306.298) east of Trith Keep, should he desire to consult the Druid.

In the interest of speed, Redneck decides to stay on the main roads before cutting east to the Starless Wastes Grove. Moving under cover of darkness, Redneck quietly makes his way through the outskirts of the villages near Trith Keep before melting into the woods. Fortunately, all encounter checks come up blank so Redneck takes some time to catch some rabbits for dinner and counts his blessings as he makes camp for the night.

Having started a small fire and put the rabbits on the spit to roast, Redneck spreads his bedroll before returning to cooking and is surprised to see a visitor sitting by the fire staring at the succulent meat on the spit.

His newfound, and somewhat expected, guest is a tall man with gaunt features, naked save for a loincloth with a staff across his knees. His long hair is matted and smeared with white woad that covers his body from crown to sole.

I check reaction and get Uncertain/positive (59% followed by a 13%) so I decide the situation unfolds as follows:

"You'll be joining me for dinner then, Dryw Porius?", Redneck asks his hoary dinner guest.

"Hmph. At least Brog taught ye proper manners, boy. The auguries were clear that we were to expect a visitor and it's always a pleasant surprise when I don't have to kill him outright. How's yer master? It's been an age since he paid me a visit."

"He's well, Dryw, though burdened by responsibilities. The Jotunn have overstepped their bounds again", Redneck tells him as he sits down crosslegged and turns the spits.

"Pfft! A nuisance, at best! Tell him I would see him when he can spare the time. Why did he send you?" Porius says as he pokes the largest rabbit with a bony finger, testing its readiness.

"I battled the wyrm Zenabarithon, Dryw, and fear I may have doomed the lake villages by my failure to slay the abomination", Redneck says, hanging his head in shame and failing to meet the gaze of the druid.

"Hmmm so that was you, eh? The villages are no more. The wyrms destroyed them and ate the hapless peasants. They'll be sated for a quite some time after their feast so we won't hear from them for months, at least. What happened? I'm surprised ye didn't end up in their gullets"

"I was betrayed, Dryw!" Redneck shouts. He shakes with rage as he says "We were attacked by the beasts in a vicious ambush! Our so-called warrior Brogallo fled in fear with his mercenary band and that scum Kleptikos! Fitzy was killed and I was near death from the icy breath of the wyrms when the wizard Blastikus and his treacherous Chaos priest Sully used a potion to mesmerize the beasts! Those black-hearted bastards convinced them we were their allies! They commanded them to attack the villages instead of finishing us." 

Redneck, falls silent, overwhelmed by the grief at the obliteration of the innocents. He sits mute, the only sounds being the crackle of the fire and the sizzle of the cooking rabbits. Porius contemplates the fire, occasionally turning the spits. After a time, he breaks the silence.

"There was nothing ye could do, boy", he says quietly. "The abominations were hungry and took ye unawares. These beasts are an affront, though, and must be dealt with before they spawn and we have a true catastrophe on our hands. Yer wyrd is unclear, but it's clear ye are not fated to die...yet."

Porius pokes the fire with a stick, and pauses, as if he's unsure about what he should say next. After a few moments, he nods once, having come to a conclusion and continues.

"As ye should know, The Order maintains the balance of our world against the abominations and Outer Dark. We use all tools to do, whether they be good or evil or slaves to the Higher Powers. Often, and always when least expected, those tools fails us and we must regroup with our brethren and true allies. Brog has taught ye this, hasn't he?", he asks sharply.

"Aye, Dryw. He has told me the truth of the world and our place in preserving it against the Enemies."

"Hmm. At least Brog righteously keeps the old ways. Well, ye just suffered the first betrayal of what will likely be many. Learn from it! Yer Brotherhood and The Order have been staunch allies for centuries and are the only ones that can be trusted! Outsiders are tools to be used for specific purposes and then discarded lest they fail ye...and they will!"

Porius takes the larger rabbit of the fire and puts it aside to cool, eyeing it hungrily. He turns to Redneck and says "Don't let the other coney cook too long! They turn rubbery if ye let it roast! Pull it off and have yer dinner. We'll get some sleep and visit my place in the morning. The auguries told me what was to be and I called fer some friends to help you track down the beasts and make them pay for their crimes. Those villagers were decent sorts and under my protection. They didn't deserve to be wyrm food. We will avenge them."

"And the betrayers, Dryw?"

"Forget them for now, boy. Their time will come. Plan their deaths and pursue them with cold determination. The wyrms are a greater threat and must be dealt with first. Then, and only then, should ye slay the filthy Chaos priest and the blackhearts. They caused the deaths of innocent and must pay the price for the scales to balance."

Redneck's Riders Appear

In the morning, Redneck and Porius break camp and travel to the Druid's cabin in hex 306.299. Porius introduces Redneck to his new allies (I rolled a d6 for number of allies, d4+4 for level so that they would roughly be around Redneck's level and rolled on the Character Subtable DMG pg 175 for the following results):

Alethras - N L6 druid
Bear Amblecrown - NE L6 fighter
Palk Mei - NG L8 magic-user

After a quick war council, the group agrees to travel to the lakes to see if they discover survivors or clues as to the dragons whereabouts.

Redneck rides for vengeance!

22 July 2024

Session 8 Downtime: Murder Hobo Meltdown



Based on the aftermath of the debacle with the Dragon Zenabarithon, the bros have been broken and divided into three groups which will pursue their own agendas and possibly come into direct conflict later in the campaign (By the Will of The Dice Gods!)
  • Blastikus and Brother Sully have formed a uneasy alliance of convenience. Though capable in their own right, they need warrior support and need to be diligent about the Oni retribution and possible stealth attacks by the Mighty Redneck, thirsty for blood to avenge the sacrifice of the lakeside peasants. They shall be known henceforth as The Winter Blast Bros until something happens to the Wand of Frost, at least...

  • Brogallo and Kleptikos have likewise been thrown into an ad hoc partnership, but they have far more common ground between them. Their interests could align into a much more mutually beneficial long term collaboration. They shall be known henceforth as The Band of Brogallos.

  • The Mighty Redneck burns with hatred for his former comrades-in-arms. It took the untimely death of his long time friend Brother Fitzy to awaken him to the severe evil that sat festering in the hearts of the others. He was betrayed in his hour of need by Brogallo and Kleptikos and witnessed Blastikus sacrifice hundreds of innocents to save his own hide while Brother Sully stood complicit in his silence. The actions of Brogallo and Kleptikos could possibly be excused due to cowardice in the face of a Chaos beast, but the wickedness of the others will be punished. His group shall be known henceforth as Redneck's Mighty Riders (well, when he actually has more than just himself in the group, that is...).
Each of these groups need to prepare themselves for the harsh new reality that confronts them, and needs to gather reinforcements and continue building their power base before enacting any plans. I'm going to break out each group into their own post, so keep an eye out for the downtime updates.

20 July 2024

Dramatis Personae



We've gotten to the point of encountering several notable NPC over the past year and it's probably a good idea to keep track of them in a central location. This post will be updated as warranted.

Fort Rackham

  • Lady Kophyn Mizzar is the mistress of the Croaking Castle of the Miraculous Toad (Hex 300.298) and protector of the nearby Fort Rackham (Hex 300.297).

  • Tazennarit is the leader of the former bandit group now turned into Fort Rackham settlers. She has a good relationship with Lady Kophyn and has become the de facto leader of the town.

  • Belgos Trith is a retired fighter and master of the keep (hex 302.298) directly east of the Croaking Castle. He has ordered his forces to patrol the roads and keep trade open for the benefit of everyone (himself included, of course).

Orchard Hollow

  • Patriarch Sirenion (Hex 302.294) is the stoic cleric of Law responsible for the spiritual well being of the citizens in the city. As presiding hierarch, he has a force of lesser clerics and a dedicated order of paladins at his command. He is suspicious of the motives of the Band of Brogallos and may be searching for them for "intensive spiritual discussions".

Tallow Watch

  • Chef Manducare Sordidum (Hex 301.295) is the proprietor of the Bistro de Sordidum soup kitchen in Tallow Watch (secretly funded by the Mighty Redneck's tithing). This is a ruse, for he is really the assassin Ardot and uses his restaurants as covers for assassinations and poison development. He has a successful working arrangement with the Temple of the Iron Claw for mutual intelligence/spy networks.

Valthrun

  • Lord Jirex, Guardian of Portal is the titular ruler of Valthrun (Hex 300.300), but the real power is rumored to lie with two radically different patrons: Kirenos, the Master of the Thieves Guild and Bilious Yarena, a Night Hag from the depths of Hades. The truth of these rumours, and the very existence of these presonages, is very much in dispute.

  • Sister Dolorosa is the abbess of The Wretched Little Tykes Home for the Unwashed orphanage in Valthrun (Hex 300.300). Her acolyte is Sister Cruciata. The orphanage is secretly funded by The Mighty Redneck. The orphanage is a cover for the Temple of the Iron Claw monk training compound.

  • Selark is a teenage street urchin and leader of the orphan spy network in the employ of Kleptikos.

  • Hamyla is the madam of a nameless brothel catering to high end clientelle. She is a member of the Kleptikos spy network.

  • Rakov is the proprietor of The White Rose, a discrete high-end inn often frequented by Brogallo.

Elsewhere

  • The White Dragon Zenabarithon and his as yet unnamed mate were spotted in Hex 301.300. Nobody knows the location of their lair or current whereabouts.

  • The master of the small keep (Hex 302.298) to the east of the Croaking Castle is Belgos Trith, a very famous human male fighter who had great success against the savage barbarian horsemen. He is largely retired, but keeps patrols on the roads to ensure trade continues to flow.

  • Brog Bersk is a The Warden of Valthrun, a ranger lord and ruler of an aerie stronghold in the mountains (Hex 301.302) south of the Shrine of Lethria.

  • Porius Sepret is the Druid of the Order of the Starless Wastes and is rumored to be living in the forests (Hex 306.298) east of Trith Keep.

17 July 2024

Session 8: The Sundering of the Bros

 


The Bros are all trained up and newly buffed up with additional bro-cenary troops under Brogallo's command. A roll on the rumor table comes up with a 7, so the Bros are heading back to the Ruined Monastery to see what compelled the Oni to invade the territory and devastate Gunnolfsfell. They decide to forgo the road and cut through hex 301.300 (containing the Shrine of Lethria) to reach hex 302.301 (containing the Ruined Monastery). Random encounters both come up positive, which means we'll be rolling on the temperate wilderness tables on DMG pg 184 to see what they discover. Note even though the Cold Wastes are a northern tundra environment, I'm using the real world calendar as the campaign calendar. Since it's July and a balmy 92 degrees Farenheit here in Boston, MA it seems kinda silly to roll on the subarctic table.

Hex 301.300 is mountainous and comes up with an 11 which means Dragon and a potential world of excrement falling down on the Bros. A further roll on the Dragon Table (pg 185) gives us two 7HD (35hp, 35hp) adult average size White Dragons (per rolls on AD&D MM pg 29 and 34). They're not in their lair (31% and need a 20%), so I say they're a mated pair of dragons hunting for some food. They can speak (18%) but aren't spell casters (71%).

Hex 302.301 is forested hills and comes up with an Ogre. Given previous events, I'm ruling this is the Oni Chief and his remaining clan members who have been lurking in the area, nursing their wounds, and waiting for the chance to enact their revenge. I decide they've been quietly stocking the party invisibly waiting for their chance to kill the human weaklings and retrieve their treasure maps.

We'll resolve the dragon encounter first to see if The Bros survive to face the Oni and the Ruined Monastery.

Neither party is surprised (Party 6, Dragons 5) and the party loses initiative (4 to 3). A reaction check comes back at 53% (Neutral - uninterested - uncertain). I decide the Dragons are going to attack since I've already established they're hungry and looking for a snack. Encounter distance is 11" - well within combat range.

Round 1 actions:
Blastikus: Use Potion of Evil Dragon Control (seriously how awesome are random rolls?? It's not like I planned this encounter!)
Brogallo: Attempts to rally bro-cenaries and flee, seeing nothing but death if he remains 
Brother Fitzy: Casts Resist Cold
Brother Sully: Casts Resist Cold 
Kleptikos: Turns and runs, not willing to become a dragon snack
Mighty Redneck: Attacks with long sword

Round 1 (Party 3; Dragon 4):
The terrifying beasts of Chaos Manifest are imbued with an alien aura of utter wrongness, anathema to the natural order of the world and apex predators unchallenged by the mortal beings of this realm. The bro-cenaries fail their saving throws (with pathetic roll of 2) and are rooted to the spot in abject fear at the dread majesty of the ancient enemy. The Bros are all 6th level so are sturdy enough to shake off the effects of the dragons' horrific nature.

Dragon 1: Breathes on the party (80% roll per AD&D MM pg 30) for 35hp of damage
Blastikus: Makes save vs BW and takes 18hp leaving him at a frosty 1hp
Brogallo: Fails save and goes to 6hp
Brother Fitzy: Fails save and goes to 2hp
Brother Sully: Fails save and goes to 5hp
Kleptikos: Makes save vs BW and takes 18hp leaving him at 12hp
Mighty Redneck: Fails save and goes to 5hp

Dragon 2: Attacks Brother Fitzy and hits with 2 claws for 6hp, killing him...decisively!

Blastikus: Drinks the Potion of Evil Dragon Control; Dragon 1 fails the save but Dragon 2 makes it (with a natural 20 no less)
Brogallo: Reaction roll of 74% with a successful followup rallies the troops and they all flee
Brother Fitzy: DEAD
Brother Sully: Loses spell
Kleptikos: FLED 
Mighty Redneck: Misses

Round 2 actions:
Blastikus: Tells Dragon 1 to convince Dragon 2 that the party is their friend and they should stop trying to eat The Bros (let's see what reaction rolls determine...)
Brother Sully: Casts Cure Light Wounds on himself
Mighty Redneck: Attacks Dragon 2 with long sword since he doesn't know what Blastikus had planned

Dragon 1: Attacks Brother Sully
Dragon 2: Attacks Redneck

Round 2 (Party 5; Dragon 4):
Blastikus: Gets an adjusted reaction roll of 75% with a successful follow up so Dragon 1 reacts positively and convinces his mate to stop attacking
Brother Sully: CLW heals him for 4hp
Mighty Redneck: Misses

Dragon 1: Stops attack due to Potion of Dragon Control
Dragon 2: Stops attack due to mate's influence

Noting the disappearance of Brogallo and Kleptikos for future retaliation, Blastikus attempts to get some information from the dragons before sending them on their way.

"O great ones, we are overwhelmed by your mercy! What great beings of power you are!"

Never one to shy away from recognition of his obvious draconic superiority, the male says "Zenabarithon is pleased by your fear and recognition of the proper order of the Cosmos, fleshling. My mate and I are hungry, though, and you do look rather delicious..."

"We are unfit for the refined palate of Your Greatnesses. Surely, a multitude of plump villagers in the lakeside villages to the southeast would do more to satisfy your ravenous hungers?"

Horrified, Redneck shouts "You miserable bastard! How dare you..."

Brother Sully rapidly smacks Redneck across his mouth "Be silent, you oaf! Our fate hangs by a thread!"

The party is brought to their knees by the thunderous laughter of both dragons.

"Let us leave these primates to their own devices, my queen. These fools will do our work for us - ha! They are but a morsel best left to rot. Let us indulge ourselves in some waterside dining", Zenabarithon says as they both take to the air.

"I like you, fleshling. Make sure the Oni in the woods don't make you their meal, instead. They've been following you for miles and are waiting in Kenarath's Monastery, you know", Zenabarithon tells the survivors as he wheels away into the sky with his mate.

"Hmmm", Blastikus thinks to himself, "I didn't know that was the monastery's name. I'll have to look into that later...and into Zenabarithon as well."

Turning to address his companions, Blastikus is surprised to see that only Brother Sully remains. "What happened to the oaf?"

Brother Sully stares at Blastikus with jaded eyes before saying, "You must be joking or insane - what do you think happened? You sacrificed hundreds of peasants to save our hides. His sanctimonious personality can't abide that! We're lucky he's too battered to slit our throats here and now. He's going to be a problem later."

"For me or you?", Blastikus says in a low voice.

"Both. I'm going to have troubles of my own for daring to raise my hand against the literal manifestation of Chaos Made Flesh without worrying about your homicidal urges. Why don't you stow the murderous attitude for now, eh? We've done well together and I don't see the need to  disrupt a profitable venture with petty betrayals", Sully says while subtly changing his stance in anticipation of violence.

Blastikus sighs wearily before responding, "Agreed. I think Valthrun might be an unwise destination given our current...complications. Let's round up the horses, bury your brother and leave for Old Brightwood - it's quieted down by now. He'll expect us to go to Fort Rackham since you've got friends there and might poke around Tallow Watch while he's there. We need time to regroup and find some reasonable traveling companions. I'll send word to my idiot servants in Eilifsdalsa to let them know."

"Might as well. Pity about Fitzy, though. He wasn't a bad sort - I was starting to grow fond of him."

08 July 2024

Updated Campaign Map

 


It's been a few weeks since my last post, but life got busy. I've used the legendary DMG Appendix B to flesh out the results of the various mapping expeditions that were underway during training downtime and have generated the above map.

A few observations from the above and the first 7 sessions of solo play:

  1. So.Much.Content! This map contains a mere three fully populated 6 mile hexes and look at how much content they contain! Specifically:
    • 4 cities
    • 13 villages
    • 4 independent castles/fortresses
    • 23 ruins of various sorts
    • Over 120 one mile hexes that can be rolled for random encounters as they are traversed

  2. The Bros Are Objectively Correct! The three core AD&D books (the Holy Books of PHB, DMG, and MM) are probably the best value in gaming if you have even a modicum of creativity and are willing to jettison all notions of the necessity of post-1989 "gaming products".

    In all seriousness, ignoring the BrOSR shit talk posturing, which some find distasteful (not me - I think it's hilarious), they are objectively correct in one important fact. You don't need to buy anything outside of properly designed core rulebooks to enjoy endless hours of TTRPG fun. I think I'll post a separate rant about this, but this is enough for now.

    The three Holy Books are all you need to generate literally years worth of adventure content for your group. Master the concepts of downtime actions, patrons, faction play, 1:1 time, and figure scaling and you'll never need anything else for literal years of fun. You will never need to "buy product" because the campaign will spontaneously come alive on its own and the players will be invested as never before (...and yes DM, you too are a player in this game).

  3. I'm quite sure that the above map as-is could easily keep me occupied for the rest of the year with no further effort. "No prep" gaming might be a little bit of a stretch, but minimal prep is absolutely achievable. Get PDFs of the Three Holy Books, use an online dice roller, and you can probably generate months worth of gaming material while you're trapped at work or during a lunch break. Ka-ren, Queen of the Harpies, and your immediate supervisor, will even think you're working on TPS reports and praise your diligence! Smiles everywhere!

  4. Build factions early and don't wait until name level. Henchmen and hirelings are force multipliers, instruments of power and plot generators. Look at what my Bros have been doing, all within the rules and prior to name level:
    • Blastikus has purchased a property to create a lab and start brewing potions and writing scrolls as soon as he is able. He's hired a couple of henchmen (obtained from a randomly rolled encounter) as guards and is making moves to eventually set himself up as a local power. Will he make Eilifsdalsa his future base of operations or is it merely a feint in some more clever plan? Will Bilious Yarena allow this upstart to carve out his own fiefdom so close to hers?

    • Brogallo, by hiring mercenaries and giving them some bonus combat pay, now has a sizable mercenary company of 23 mounted men-at-arms under his command. This already establishes him as a non-trivial minor warlord and may get him noticed by the right (or wrong) people. What will Lord Jirex and Bilious Yarena have to say about Brogallo's increasing power?

    • The Mighty Redneck, obligated to donate his excess wealth to a worthy "communal or institutional cause" (PHB pg 25) has done so in two cities, extending his influence and reputation for goodness. He has been noticed by the druids during his latest training period. Will they allow him to be initiated into the deeper mysteries of the wild? Are they angry with him for expanding the prestige of "civilization" via his urban (gasp!) social institutions? Time will tell.

    • Kleptikos is laying the groundwork for his future thieves guild by quietly recruiting a network of spys and beggars, right under the nose of his ostensible "brother-in-arms", Redneck!  Remember Kleptikos is Neutral Evil and has zero problems exploiting anyone at any time for any purpose. If the goofy hillbilly wants to squander his wealth on street urchins and starving veterans, why shouldn't Kleptikos secretly leverage Redneck's gullibility for his own gain?

    • Brother Sully and Brother Fitzy quite unexpectedly got noticed by one of the Chaos Gods with some pretty fearsome future implications. Why did they get noticed? Per AD&D DMG pg 38, cleric spells of third, fourth, and fifth level are obtained through the aid of supernatural servants of the cleric’s deity, so something is paying attention to their new found ability to cast 3rd level spells. 

      Up until now, I've been pretty light on the cosmology since this is a solo campaign but I decided the DMG quote means I should come up with some sort of pantheon. I'm going with Michael Moorcock's Lords of Higher Realms motif but putting a secret society spin on it. Exactly what does their order represent? The low level mooks will never find out, but the movers and shakers will slowly be initiated into the truth. Let's see if Fitzy and Sully learn the new secret handshakes and silly walks as they level-up. 

      Note that Fitzy is kind of a good natured dope (hence his friendship with Redneck), but Sully is clearly running his own program by building up Fort Rackham with refugees and survivors who all owe their lives to him in one way or another. Is Sully just being practical or is he, in fact, laying the groundwork for a new cult loyal to him and him alone? Everyone else has been going along with his suggestions since they were mutually beneficial, but how long will that last? What will the druids in the area have to say about this through their possible agent, Mighty Redneck?

  5. Downtime and 1:1 time tracking is vital if you want to have a true living, breathing campaign that actually interests people! Everyone at the table should have their own motivations for advancing their character's agendas and these can be carried out in downtime. Encouraging this adds a lot of dynamic verisimilitude to the game without soaking up time at the table!

    If this were an IRL party of multiple players instead of my solo campaign, would Brogallo's player want to waste time listening to Kleptikos laying out the details of his urchin and whore network? No!! The group probably only has a few hours per week available to roll dice and slay dragons! All of this other stuff is nice character flavor that the group may appreciate, but free time for adults with family responsibilities is at a premium.

  6. PvP is inherent to the game, but not necessarily in the way that it is popularly misconstrued. Does your group want to have the thief backstab the magic-user in the middle of combat "because that's what my character would do"? My guess is a resounding "FUCK NO" (and kick that fucking retard sociopath out of your group, by the way), but it's quite another thing if all players have competing agendas that run constantly in the background (i.e. use downtime and 1:1 time). This is even better if you have multiple player groups active at the same time since they could screw with each other via downtime actions or by swapping DMs/stories.

    PvP makes alignment a meaningful choice. Is the assassin going to say "Lolz - I kill people for coin and sadistic kicks!" to the NG ranger? No, he's going to keep his mouth shut and pass off his badass combat skills as "lessons from the school of hard knocks since I can never hope to develop your martial skills". So why is the assassin in the party? Because he wants to use these dopes as cover and subvert their factions for his own ends without revealing himself. Maybe the druid senses the truth about the assassin and keeps his mouth shut since he may have a future need for his services when the ranger morally objects to some necessary unpleasantness required to "maintain the balance".

    Study real world history, especially post-WWII to expand your viewpoint. "The party" is not The Super Friends (blecch!) or The Getalong Gang (double blecch!) - it is the Allied Powers of World War II. Remember that the "Big Four" - the United Kingdom, United States, Soviet Union, and China - did not ally because they had a deep and abiding love of each other. They were facing a threat to their hegemony from an organized and determined enemy. It was in their mutual interest to pool resources (somewhat) and coordinate military activity to eliminate a threat. They certainly didn't toast marshmallows and sing Kum Bah Yah around a campfire, in spite of the fairy tales they still like to tell about their "fight against evil". Oil, land, global financial restructuring, and monopolizing natural resources had nothing to do with it, right?

  7. Don't get overly attached to any character when running AD&D RAW. I forgot how shockingly lethal this game is when played correctly. Look at The Book of The Dead post. As of this writing, eight of sixteen generated PCs have been sent to Valhalla which translates to a 50% mortality rate (for those of you who are too stoopid to figure that out on your own). How does that compare to reality?
    • WWII Mortality Rate for USSR: 13.7%
    • WWII Mortality Rate for Nazi Germany: ~8.5%
    • WWII Mortality Rate for USA: 0.3%
This information is from Wikipedia - you can argue about the absolute veracity of the numbers but the scale is accurate IMO. Medieval/ancient battles are tougher to calculate, but this thread has some good info. If we go with a super high estimate and use 25%, it means AD&D is insanely lethal when compared to reality. Session zero, extensive backstory and "muh character" is for theatre kid dopes, not devotees of True AD&D.

OK, long post but I was on a roll (Ha! See what I did there?). Back to gaming in the next post...


26 June 2024

THIS is D&D

THIS is D&D:


 



THIS is mental illness:




Choose the mythic journey of the hero, NOT the ravings of the insane pederast.

Don't give money to people who hate you!

19 May 2024

Session 7 Downtime: A New Level of Confidence and Power



Kleptikos convinces the former slaves and battered pikemen to help them move the loot carts to Valthrun where they can be converted to gold and shared with everyone (33% reaction roll modified to 63% - Uncertain but 55% prone to positive followed up by a 44% to seal the deal). They safely travel the 3 hexes from Gunnolfsfell to Valthrun.

Kleptikos handles fencing the goods and the party divides the remaining spoils. Brother Sully recommends that each PC give the surviving villagers 10gp each as settlement funds and send them off to Fort Rackham to help the settlement grow. Everyone agrees it makes sense to have a friendly bolthole and agree. Bro-gallo points out that it would also be a wise idea to pay extra to the remaining pikemen and the Bro-cenaries to maintain morale and ensure that the party doesn't develop a bad reputation amongst the mercenary groups operating in the area. Everyone agrees and each pay a 100gp bonus to every Bro-cenary as well as a 50gp bonus to the remaining pikemen.

I give a +20% bonus when Brother Sully announces this to both groups. Sharing the spoils has the intended effect, as the mercenaries (21 roll + 20% bonus + 25% CHA bonus adds up to 66% for an Uncertain but 55% prone to positive result followed by a 43%) and villagers (90 roll + 20% bonus + 25% CHA bonus adds up to 115% for an Enthusiastically friendly, immediate acceptance result) both positively react to the offers. Captain Lou wants to take the pikemen back to Tallow Watch and recruit some new members. He agrees to escort the villagers to Fort Rackham and convey a message to Lady Kophyn about the developments.

The party all gains sufficient XP to level up and will be out of action for for 3 weeks as they train, available again on June 8.

Individual Activities

In addition to their training, the Bros start other initiatives during downtime.
  • Blastikus decides he wants to obtain a more secure location with privacy to begin more serious magic research in anticipation of eventually setting up a true sanctum. Through discrete inquiries with the appropriate agents, he has learned of a suitable stone house with a sturdy wall in the nearby hamlet of Eilifsdalsa (hex 299.301). The hamlet has a nefarious reputation of being a refuge for strange loners of dubious character and is avoided by most reputable people of Valthrun. He also finds a nearby farmhouse for use of any bodyguards and purchases both properties for 700gp, per AD&D DMG pg 107. He approaches the two half-orc fighters that they rescued from the monastery of Gunnolfsfell and makes them an offer to become his henchmen. Per DMG pg 35, Blastikus offers them 100gp and 300gp respectively, use of the cottage for lodgings, and armor weapons in exchange for their guard duties and occasional  errand running. This brings the base chance to 30% with Blastikus CHA bonus taking it to 40%. Blastikus rolls a 28% and the skeptical half-orcs accept the easy duty. He recycles the gear from Bro-jira and Brother O'malley and the orcs seem content with the arrangement.

    He sends them off to the new base and orders them to map areas west of Valthrun (i.e. reveal the remaining six mile hex centered on Valthrun) so that he knows what to expect.

    Blastikus begins creating his lab and spends 1000gp (per DMG pg 116) to do the initial build out, with an additional 100gp monthly upkeep fee. This is all specialized gear that must be fabricated form scratch so I decide it won't be available until 6/19 (one month). Things are going to start going off the rails very, very, soon...muhahahaha!

  • Brogallo has received a taste of being a warlord commanding ravenous hordes and has found it much to his liking. While sampling higher-end drinking establishments available to his new found wealth, he's overheard some envious talk about his success on the battlefield and the resulting caravan of loot that made its way into the city. He spreads some coin around to notorious loudmouths and tells them some stories of his awesomeness, knowing the gossip will grow in the telling. Cheap propaganda is the best propaganda!

    Desiring the scrolls in the hoard from the Oni treasure map, Blastikus confers with Brogallo and informs him that he would like to journey to the ruined city in search of the loot. Brogallo readily agrees since he too is obsessed with the treasure maps recovered from the Oni.

    The magic item hoard in hex 301.499 is a 200 mile journey that will require a lot of preparation, so it will have to wait for now. The ruined city in hex 311.304, however, is a mere 10 miles and a source of ready loot. He wants more information about the surroundings to avoid a repeat of the recent bloodshed. 
    and decides to send the Bro-cenaries on another reconnaissance run.

    He reckons it's time to expand the force and wants to hire more mercenaries. He rolls a 78 followed by an 8 and 10 on the mercenary table (DMG pg 30) which means he hires 10 medium horsemen and a mandatory L2 lieutenant (Lt. Stoner) along with a serjeant (Sgt. Rock). They all demand new gear, which he provides to match the existing squad under the command of Sgt. Slaughter.

    Brogallo summons the officers and informs them of the command changes, placing Lt. Stoner in charge under Brogallo, of course. He informs them that he wants a detailed reconnaissance map of the area southeast of Gunnolfsell (i.e. the two six mile hexes centered on hex 306.300 and 312.306) so that they don't run into any nasty surprises and can hire additional mercs if needed. This is a "view and screw" mission, so the mercs are to avoid combat unless directly threatened. They make a copy of the existing map and move out to commence mapping.
  • Kleptikos reckons it's more profitable to stay independent of any local cliques and begins building his own intelligence network. He quietly begins hunting down all street urchins and directing them to The Redneck Home for Wayward Munchkins with the understanding that they key their ears open and mouths shut. In return for information, he agrees to share some choice trinkets from time to time. Any waif that is too stupid or stubborn to play ball quietly disappears and ends up on the vermin buffet in the sewers. Liches Eat Snitches, after all. He also approaches every "professional evening entertainer" with similar offers and unsurprisingly finds an extremely receptive group that is all too happy to swap gossip for coin. These burgeoning networks will incur an ongoing monthly cost of 200gp, which Kleptikos considers cheap insurance against nasty surprises.

  • Mighty Redneck keeps 1000gp as usual to cover his expenses and donates the rest to worthy causes. The continues funding The Redneck Home for Wayward Munchkins in Valthrun and, moved by the plight of Tallow Watch refugees, he opens up Redneck's Gumbo Kitchen to feed the teaming masses fleeing from the northern hordes. What a great guy! No way this will blow up in his face, right? Right??

    Redneck's training takes place in the mountains outside Valthrun under the tutelage of an experienced and grizzled Ranger Lord named Brog Bersk. It was during his latest sessions that he is first introduced to Marcinius, initiate of the druidic Order of the Starless Wastes. Apart from some terse pleasantries, little of substance is discussed, but Redneck can't shake the feeling that he has broken through to a new level of...something.

  • Brother Fitzy and Brother Sully independently have an identical, profound psycho-spiritual experience. While deep in meditation and prayer to their patron deity, Mabelrode the Faceless King of Swords, they psychically transported to a realm far away from the Cold Wastes. They find themselves on a rocky island beneath a black starless sky, lit by an endless storm of incandescent purple lightning bolts. Buffeted by a howling gale that has stripped the island to the bare rock, they stare at the raw stuff of chaos that bubbles around the isle. They stand mesmerized as gargantuan behemoths of incomprehensible size rise from the tumultuous chaos stuff, only to instantly dissolve, fall back into the maelstrom and instantly reform into baroque structures of crystal and light. Entire civilizations and races of strange beings are born, prosper, decay and dissolve in the space on an eye blink. Feeling their sanity and sense of self begin to fray uncontrollably, they are shocked when they see a twelve foot tall being of crystal emerge from the chaos seas and stride toward them. Terrified, they stand helpless as the entity stops a mere arm's length from them and silently regards them. A pulsing yellow light radiates from within the creature and covers them with it's sickly golden hues.

    "Kneel, mortals", the being says.

    Understanding that this is a being of pure chaos, the brothers do the sensible thing and dive to the ground, prostrating themselves before this being.

    "We have noticed you. Your world has changed. The King of Swords has entrusted you to us.", it says.

    "Great angel, we...", Brother Sully begins.

    "Silence!", the entity booms, its voice slamming into the brothers as a warhammer on a melon. "Do not mistake this as a conversation! We will speak and you will listen."

    "You seek greater favor from the King of Swords, but are unworthy at your current level of psycho-spiritual development. He will never speak to your like and sends us to improve your limited mortal potential. We will grant you an increase in power in exchange for greater responsibility and adherence to The Faceless One's will."

    "We will speak to you again when required and reveal the King's wishes. Execute them, or be destroyed. Say nothing to others in The Order. Begone."

    With a thunderous explosion of mauve lightning, the brothers awake in their respective cells, in excruciating pain from the burns that cover their bodies. This was not a dream - it was a revelation.

17 May 2024

Session 7: The Purging of Gunnolfsfell - Part 2

 

The Bros are in relatively good strength, but they've lost half of the pikemen. The battlefield loot has helped soothe the troops' nerves and a successful morale check means the remaining 20 pikemen are willing to stick around...provided there's a bonus. Brogallo agrees to double wages and more battlefield loot, securing their temporary loyalty.

Mighty Redneck attempts to track any movement away from the camp and easily does so (7 Oni, 3 ogresses, 7 bugbears armed with morningstars, 13 orcs armed with battle axes, 60 slaves and 5 carts are pretty easy to follow).

The party lines up as the previous order of battle (party in the vanguard,10 crossbow cavalry and 20 pikemen in the rear). Redneck and Kleptikos will scout ahead and report back before any action occurs.


Key to the Upper Level:

The 7 bugbears (11hp, 17hp, 9hp, 19hp, 5hp, 8hp, 13hp) are sloppily guarding the camp while shooting dice and squabbling. They have a total of 99cp between them. 

There are 5 orc slave carts are in a crudely constructed pen next to the ruins of the monastery. The orcs have 60 slave bearers (all 0-level humans), all badly beaten and tied to the carts. These wretches include the 7 survivors of Gunnolfsfell as well as other unfortunates the orcs have captured along the way. 

The slave carts and bearers have loot worth the following:
Monetary Contents:      
Slave Carts:                4,000gp
Slave Bearers:            1,080gp
Total Hoard Value:      5,080gp

The slave pens are guarded by 5 bored orcs (5,8,6,7,8)

Area 1: The Ogress Pavilion

The Ogre Females from the Serpent Shrine (14hp, 13hp, 13hp) are here, relaxing and scheming about seducing the Oni to get leverage on them. They will fight the PCs to death to avenge their young. 

There are sacks in the corner containing the treasure from the Serpent Shrine: 
            2,150ep and an Ebony Fly Figurine of Wondrous Power

Area 2: The Ogre Magi Pavilion

The Oni have a group of 5 prisoners (a brigand, a L1 Half-Orc fighter, a L3 Half-Orc, a peasant from the far Northern plains, and a sailor that they picked up in a distant slave market) chained to stakes outside their tent. The Oni have been brutally interrogating these poor bastards thinking that they must know something about the ruins in the map (Surprise! They know nothing). 

Within the tent, the Oni Chief (22hp) is reviewing the treasure map with advisers (31hp, 24hp). There is a chest here with the group's treasure:
Monetary Contents:      6,020gp; 32,111pp
Jewelry (qty 10):
Idol, Ivory or wrought silver jewelry (164gp)
Buckle, Ivory or wrought silver jewelry (782gp)
Necklace, Ivory or wrought silver jewelry (746gp)
Earring, Platinum jewelry with gems (1802gp)
Buckle, Wrought silver and gold jewelry (856gp)
Box (small), Wrought silver and gold jewelry (1022gp)
Medal, Gold jewelry with gems (719gp)
Decanter, Platinum jewelry with gems (1135gp)
Idol, Ivory or wrought silver jewelry (830gp)
Idol, Wrought gold jewelry (586gp)
Magic Items (qty 6):
Potion of Clairvoyance (300xp, 500gp)
Potion of Dragon Control (Evil dragons [Black, blue, green, red, white]) (500xp, 5,000gp)
Potion of ESP (500xp, 850gp)
Potion of Flying (500xp, 750gp)
Potion of Growth (250xp, 300gp)
Potion of Levitation (250xp, 400gp)

Dagger +2, +3 vs. creatures larger than man-sized (250xp, 2,000gp)
Ring of Warmth (1,000xp, 5,000gp)
Scroll of Protection from Petrification (2,000 x.p.)

Total Hoard Value:                190,217gp
Total Monetary Value:     166,575gp
Total Jewelry Value:            8,642gp
Total Magic Item Value:     15,000gp

There are also 2 treasure maps on a table that the Oni are studying. The Oni mistakenly believe that one of the maps points to the monastery they're excavating (it really points to the ruined city in hex 311.304), while the other map points to a hoard 100 miles distant (in hex 301.499).

Treasure Map 1:
Map to a combined hoard. The destination is somewhere in the ruins, 10 miles distant towards the southeast (Ruined City in hex 311.304)
Treasure Map Contents:
Monetary Contents:      1,336pp
Gems (qty 91): Details omitted for conciseness but value is 86,180gp
Magic Items (qty 15):
Potion of Extra Healing (400xp, 800gp)
Potion of Plant Control (250xp, 300gp)
Potion of Treasure Finding (600xp, 2,000gp)
Potion of Dragon Control (Copper dragons) (500xp, 5,000gp)
Potion of Human Control (Humans) (500xp, 900gp)
Potion of Longevity (500xp, 1,000gp)
Potion of Super-Heroism (F) (450xp, 750gp)
Spell scroll (3 Magic User spells) (1,200xp, 3,600gp)
    L4: Fear, Monster Summoning II, Rary’s Mnemonic Enhancer
Spell scroll (3 Magic User spells) (600xp, 1,800gp)
    L2: Mirror Image, Polymorph Other
    L4: Fire Charm 
Scroll of Protection from Lycanthropes (Wererats) (1,000xp, 5,000gp)
Scroll of Protection from Lycanthropes (Werewolves) (1,000xp, 5,000gp)
Scroll of Protection from Undead (1,500xp, 7,500gp)
Scroll of Protection from Weapons, Non-magic edged (UA) (1,000xp, 5,000gp)
Wand of Fear (C,M) [98 charges] (3,000xp, 15,000gp)
Wings of Flying (750xp, 7,500gp)
Total Hoard Value:                154,010gp
Total Monetary Value:         6,680gp
Total Gem Value:              86,180gp
Total Magic Item Value:    53,650gp

Treasure Map 2:
Map to magic treasure hoard. The destination is guarded in a lair, 200 miles distant towards the south (hex 301.499)
Treasure Map Contents:
Magic Items (qty 3):
Ring Mail +1 (400xp, 2,500gp)
Sword +1 Short sword [Non-intelligent] (400xp, 2,000gp)
Crossbow of Speed (1,500xp, 7,500gp)
Rod of Cancellation (any) (10,000xp, 15,000gp)
Tome of Leadership and Influence (7,500xp, 40,000gp)

Total Hoard Value:                   67,000gp
Total Magic Item Value:     67,000gp

The upper level of the monastery is in ruins and the Oni are using the orcs to excavate and clear the ruins as much as possible. They've finally reached the stairs leading down to the catacombs and are making the final push to the underground vault when the party appears.

There is little of interest in the upper ruins, but the remaining Oni are nonetheless spread out and investigating the ruins in the hopes of finding more loot.

The Monastery Ruins

Room 3: Reception area
Room 4: Altar to the Gods of Law
Room 5: Scriptorium
Ogre Mage 20hp
Room 6: Library
Ogre Mage 25hp
Room 7: Monks Cells
Room 8: Monks Cells
Room 9: Abbot's Quarters
Room 10: Stairs to the Vaults
Ogre Mage (23hp, 19hp) are supervising 8 orcs (6,5,1,7,7,2,7,2) who are excavating the stairs down to the catacombs. They've torn down the walls surrounding the stairs and are dumping the rubble into the adjoining monk cells (room 8). The orcs and Oni are spread out throughout areas 10 and 4, so they'll be able to move freely in combat. The Oni aren't stupid...

The Battle for the Monastery Begins

Kleptikos and Redneck approach the ruins through the forest surrounding the area. Once again, Redneck hangs back to provide covering fire if needed while Kleptikos scouts ahead. He succeeds on both Move Silently (16% and needed under 26%) and Hide in Shadows (18% and needed 20%). He can see the two large pavilions with the bugbear guards as well as the slavepens guarded by 5 orcs. He fails the Hear Noise check and can't make out any sounds within the pavilions or the monastery ruins.

He decides this is enough info to form a battle plan, rejoins Redneck and they both return to the party to share their findings. They reason the pavilions probably contain some of the ogres (due to the obvious bugbear guards) with the remaining group possibly exploring the monastery. The party will creep up on the camp and surprise attack, trying to take out as many enemies as possible. 

Order of Battle:
Blastikus will blast tent 2 (randomly determined via dice roll) with Ice Storm from the Wand of Frost.

Kleptikos will move to tent 1 and hide by the entrance, attempting to backstab anything that comes out of the pavilion.

Brogallo, Bro-jira, and Mighty Redneck will engage the bugbears.

Brother Fitzy, Brother O'malley, Brother Sully will engage the orcs.

The pikemen will split into two units of 10 and finish any straggler orc/bugbears.

The Brocenaries will split their forces and attack any creatures that exit either of the tents.

Round 1:
Surprise: Party is not surprised since they're springing an ambush. Bugbears are not surprised (3) but the orcs are surprised (1) for 1 segment. Encounter distance is 13". Party is not yet in melee range.
Initiative: Party wins 6 to 4

Blastikus hits tent 2 with the wand for 25hp damage. The Oni chief and one of his assistants go down and the remaining assistant is at 6hp. The two maps and the chest all make their saving throws vs magical frost, so they aren't destroyed by the Ice Storm.

Remaining party members and monsters spend their turn moving into melee range with their opponents.

Round 2:
Initiative: Party wins 6 to 1
Blastikus use Wand of Frost to create a Wall of Ice to block the entrance to the ruins

Kleptikos backstab Ogress 1 and misses with a 14. This is not good.

Brogallo attacks bugbear 1 and hits for 10+3hp, killing it
Bro-jira misses bugbear 2
Mighty Redneck hits bugbear 3 for 5+1+5hp, killing it

Brother Fitzy misses orc 1
Brother O'malley misses orc 2
Brother Sully hits orc 3 for 5hp, killing it

Bro-cenary unit 1 miss invisible Oni
Bro-cenary unit 2 hits Ogress 1 with 3 bolts for 4hp

Pikemen unit 1 hits bugbear 5 for 9hp killing it
Pikemen unit 2 hits bugbear 6 for 11hp killing it

Oni assistant 1 (6hp) will turn invisible, exit the tent and attack Bro-jira. He hits for 3hp
Oni chief will take 3 rounds to regenerate and regain consciousness
Oni assistant 2 regenerates to 0hp

Ogress 1 (14hp) hits Kleptikos for 5
Ogress 2 (13hp) moves to support bugbears and attacks Redneck from rear and misses
Ogress 3 (13hp) moves to support bugbears and attacks Redneck from rear and misses

Bugbear 1 DEAD 
Bugbear 2 (17hp) misses Bro-jira
Bugbear 3 DEAD 
Bugbear 4 (19hp) hits Brogallo for 5hp
Bugbear 5 DEAD
Bugbear 6 DEAD
Bugbear 7 (13hp) hits Mighty Redneck for 6hp

Orc 1 (6hp) misses Brother Fitzy
Orc 2 (8hp) misses Brother O'malley
Orc 3 DEAD
Orc 4 (7hp) misses Brother Fitzy
Orc 5 (8hp) misses Brother O'malley

Round 3:
Initiative: Monsters win 4 to 1
Oni assistant 1 (6hp) hits Bro-jira for 9hp, killing him
Oni chief will take 2 rounds to regenerate and regain consciousness
Oni assistant 2 regains consciousness with 1 hp

Ogress 1 (10hp) misses Kleptikos
Ogress 2 (13hp) misses Redneck from rear
Ogress 3 (13hp) misses Redneck from rear

Bugbear 1 DEAD 
Bugbear 2 (17hp) misses Brogallo 
Bugbear 3 DEAD 
Bugbear 4 (19hp) misses Brogallo
Bugbear 5 DEAD
Bugbear 6 DEAD
Bugbear 7 (13hp) misses Mighty Redneck

Orc 1 (6hp) misses Brother Fitzy
Orc 2 (8hp) hits Brother O'malley for 8hp
Orc 3 DEAD
Orc 4 (7hp) hits Brother Fitzy for 4hp
Orc 5 (8hp) misses Brother Sully


Blastikus misses Ogress 1 with thrown dagger
Kleptikos misses Ogress 1

Brogallo attacks bugbear 2 and hits for 4+3hp
Bro-jira DEAD
Mighty Redneck hits bugbear 7 for 4+1+5hp

Brother Fitzy hits orc 1 for 6hp, killing it
Brother O'malley misses orc 2
Brother Sully hits orc 4 for 5hp

Bro-cenary unit 1 miss invisible Oni
Bro-cenary unit 2 hits Ogress 1 with 1 bolts for 3hp

Pikemen unit 1 misses
Pikemen unit 2 hits bugbear 4 for 9hp


Round 4:
Initiative: Party wins 6 to 1
Blastikus misses Ogress 1 with thrown dagger
Kleptikos misses Ogress 1

Brogallo misses bugbear 2
Bro-jira DEAD
Mighty Redneck hits bugbear 4 for 6+1+5hp, killing it

Brother Fitzy misses orc 1
Brother O'malley misses orc 2
Brother Sully misses orc 3

Bro-cenary unit 1 hits Ogress 2 with 2 bolts for 4hp
Bro-cenary unit 2 hits Ogress 1 with 2 bolts for 7hp, killing her

Pikemen unit 1 hits bugbear 2 for 24hp killing it
Pikemen unit 2 hits bugbear 7 for 19hp killing it

Oni assistant 1 (6hp) casts Cone of Cold on pikemen (both units) for 38hp; both units fail save; I use 5.5hp avg for man-at-arms meaning 9 pikemen are now corpsicles; they pass their morale check
Oni chief will take 1 round to regenerate and regain consciousness
Oni assistant 2 regenerates, taking him to 2hp; he fails morale check, assumes Gaseous Form and flees the battle

Ogress 1 DEAD
Ogress 2 (9hp) hits Redneck from rear for 4hp
Ogress 3 (13hp) misses Redneck from rear

Bugbear 1 DEAD 
Bugbear 2 DEAD 
Bugbear 3 DEAD 
Bugbear 4 DEAD
Bugbear 5 DEAD
Bugbear 6 DEAD
Bugbear 7 DEAD

Orc 1 DEAD
Orc 2 (8hp) hits Brother O'malley for 8hp, killing him
Orc 3 DEAD
Orc 4 (2hp) hits Brother Fitzy for 5hp
Orc 5 (8hp) misses Brother Sully

Round 5:
Initiative: Monsters wins 5 to 2
Oni assistant 1 (6hp) casts Sleep on pikemen (both units) taking out 4 pikemen; 5 pikemen left; they pass their morale check again - dudes are tough
Oni chief regains consciousness with 1 hp
Oni assistant 2 FLED

Ogress 1 DEAD
Ogress 2 (9hp) misses Redneck
Ogress 3 (13hp) misses Redneck

Bugbear 1 DEAD 
Bugbear 2 DEAD 
Bugbear 3 DEAD 
Bugbear 4 DEAD
Bugbear 5 DEAD
Bugbear 6 DEAD
Bugbear 7 DEAD

Orc 1 DEAD
Orc 2 (8hp) misses Brother Sully 
Orc 3 DEAD
Orc 4 (2hp) misses Brother Fitzy 
Orc 5 (8hp) hits Brother Fitzy for 6hp

Blastikus misses Ogress 2 with thrown dagger
Kleptikos hits Ogress 3 with backstab for 5x2hp

Brogallo misses Oni assistant 1
Bro-jira DEAD
Mighty Redneck hits Oni assistant 1 with 7+1+5hp, killing it

Brother Fitzy misses orc 2
Brother O'malley DEAD
Brother Sully misses orc 4

Bro-cenary unit 1 misses Ogress 2
Bro-cenary unit 2 hits Ogress 1 with 2 bolts for 8hp, killing her

Pikemen unit 1 DEAD
Pikemen unit 2 hits Ogress 3 for 10hp killing her

Round 6:
Initiative: Monsters wins 6 to 4
Oni assistant 1 DEAD
Oni chief regenerates to 2hp; assumes Gaseous Form and flees to monastery to get reinforcements
Oni assistant 2 FLED

Ogress 1 DEAD
Ogress 2 (9hp) hits Redneck for 4hp
Ogress 3 DEAD

Bugbear 1 DEAD 
Bugbear 2 DEAD 
Bugbear 3 DEAD 
Bugbear 4 DEAD
Bugbear 5 DEAD
Bugbear 6 DEAD
Bugbear 7 DEAD

Orc 1 DEAD
Orc 2 (8hp) hits Brother Sully for 5hp
Orc 3 DEAD
Orc 4 (2hp) misses Brother Fitzy 
Orc 5 (8hp) misses Brother Fitzy


Blastikus misses Ogress 2 with thrown dagger
Kleptikos misses Ogress 2 

Brogallo hits Ogress 2 for 5+3hp, killing her
Bro-jira DEAD
Mighty Redneck misses Ogress 2

Brother Fitzy misses orc 2
Brother O'malley DEAD
Brother Sully misses orc 4

Bro-cenary unit 1 hits Orc 2 with 3 bolts for 9hp killing it
Bro-cenary unit 2 hits Orc 4 with 1 bolts for 3hp, killing it

Pikemen unit 1 DEAD
Pikemen unit 2 moves to slave pen to free prisoners


Round 7:
Initiative: Party wins 5 to 3
Blastikus moves to tent 1 to search for loot
Kleptikos moves to tent 2 to search for loot

Brogallo moves to tent 1 to search for loot
Bro-jira DEAD
Mighty Redneck retrieves Bro-Jira's body

Brother Fitzy hits orc 5 for 3+1hp
Brother O'malley DEAD
Brother Sully hits orc 5 for 3+1hp, killing it

Bro-cenary unit 1 moves to help free the prisoners
Bro-cenary unit 2 moves to help free the prisoners

Pikemen unit 1 DEAD
Pikemen unit 2 moves to slave pen to free prisoners

Oni assistant 1 DEAD
Oni chief regenerates to 3hp; in monastery getting reinforcements
Oni assistant 2 FLED

Ogress 1 DEAD
Ogress 2 DEAD
Ogress 3 DEAD

Bugbear 1 DEAD 
Bugbear 2 DEAD 
Bugbear 3 DEAD 
Bugbear 4 DEAD
Bugbear 5 DEAD
Bugbear 6 DEAD
Bugbear 7 DEAD

Orc 1 DEAD
Orc 2 DEAD
Orc 3 DEAD
Orc 4 DEAD
Orc 5 DEAD

Aftermath:

The Wall of Ice has 5 turns left. The Oni Chief, still in Gaseous Form, lingers around the entrance and sees what the party has done. He is seething with rage over his assistant's betrayal and the party's theft of his treasure. The Oni Chief tries to rally his troops to go after the party, but I decide that the heavy casualties are going to impact his standing with the underlings. A reaction roll will be necessary at a -20% penalty and the chief rolls a 21 which gets modded down to 1% (i.e. Violently Hostile.).The Oni and orcs viciously deride the Chief's ridiculous quest for the nonexistent treasure as they unceremoniously turn their backs on him and abandon his fool's quest. The Chief's honor is in tatters. He swears vengeance and bides his time until he can enact his revenge.

Brother Sully and Brother Fitzy retrieve the remains of Brother O'malley and add him to the Dead Cart with Bro-jira. They then heal up the remaining party members in anticipation of more trouble from the Oni.

Brother Fitzy CLW on Kleptikos for 4hp
Brother Fitzy CLW on Mighty Redneck for 3hp
Brother Fitzy CLW on Mighty Redneck for 6hp
Brother Sully CLW on Brother Fitzy for 7hp
Brother Sully CLW on Brother Fitzy for 3hp
Brother Sully CLW on Mighty Redneck for 8hp

The party and mercs retreat to Gunnolfsfell with the newly freed slaves and all goods. The peasants toss the dead orcs onto hastily erected pyres and bury the dead mercs and Bros.

That's it for this session - it was definitely packed with a lot of developments. Let's see what happens in downtime.